Even in College, There is Death

I've no desire to feel nostalgia. I think if I had a get-together with some of the folks I started college with that I would feel nostalgic and could handle it, but my best college friends switched schools or graduated a year ago or are a year younger and slower to finish than I. Or, dropped out entirely before getting very far.

Therefore, looking back on the years seems like a horrible idea to me. All I seem to come up with is 'but there are people I miss...' and then the memories stop flooding back. When I do want to 'feel' as it were, I will think lovingly of:

MM Hall and the "secret" tower-dungeon
Photography class
PSU
Art Attack(s)
wanderings with hippie friends (sunshine, jenn, cory and more)
the baywatch greeting, though it shall live on
losing my favorite sweatshirt... hey wait! that sucks!!!
living in the art building (and haunting it)
painting class
free photoshop (cries)
that weird rabbit sculpture
astronomy class
a golden girl
whistling in the dark. and all the time.
bagel place
the pirate party
Perk, despite whatever flaws
Noodles and potbelly..... ok, i know they're chain restos...
ALL THE BUBBLE TEA and cheese wonton you can afford
laying on the mall and imagining i'm in a fishbowl
poetry-writing
lying out in the rain waiting for the hurricane to wash over me ecstatic and free to help me to see that i had chosen......... pneumonia.
crabapple blossoms tree
lili and ting/the clubhouse year
the house of sun and light
I-goddamn-rene
freshman orientation with those goofballs
women's bball
learning french <3


And you know what? anybody else would be 'oh, i'm crying'. I'm not. Do I even want to go to graduation? Uh.... if I get to meet the basketball team? If I can really tapdance across the stage. If I don't fall asleep while they're calling my name? If I can read my book about pandemics while Someone in the audience inadvertently infects us ALL with swine flu...........

Lemme just.... take out my raincheck calender and pencil you in, dear graduation.... lemme just.

Put off the nostalgia, I just got back in town from SADDwinter.